How Gilmore Girls Characters Would Respond to Pregnancy and Birth

My top three passions in life are birth, writing, and overanalyzing fictional characters, so it was only a matter of time before all three collided. Thus, this blog series was born! I will be assigning birth plans and pregnancy/birth experiences to fictional characters based entirely on vibes, psychological profiling, and my own personal vendettas against them.

I originally got this idea from Gio (@birthwithgio, go follow her, she’s brilliant!) after she did this in a TikTok for Heated Rivalry, and ever since then I have been having too much fun thinking up scenarios for different pieces of media. 

And because I just started rewatching Gilmore Girls, the residents of Stars Hollow are unfortunately the first victims of this analysis (especially Dean. Spoiler: he is cheating while in labor) 

Now I know what you’re thinking: “Angela, Dean can’t give birth” and to that I say WHO CARESSSS. For the purposes of this analysis, we are suspending biological reality because the image of Taylor selling tickets to his home birth is too important to ignore. This is not about medical accuracy so much as spiritual accuracy, so mpreg is real within the contexts of this series. 

Also, I will be engaging with A Day in the Life only as much as it meets my needs, and I will create romantic pairings inconsistently and as I see fit. I would say I don’t make the rules, however… 

Lorelai Gilmore

Lorelai would have a medically uncomplicated pregnancy, but she would be absolutely miserable the first trimester because of caffeine withdrawals. I think she would get induced at 39 weeks without telling anybody and she has a high Bishop Score so they go straight to pitocin. Luke is extremely stressed and gets annoyed when anesthesia takes forever to get there for her epidural, but Lorelai makes jokes through her contractions and gets the epidural around 5 centimeters dilated. The epidural works great so she watches movies and naps until transition, where her epidural fails and she asks for her mom. Emily is hurt that she didn’t tell her she was in labor, but obviously comes and is supportive through the birth. Afterwards she eats so so so much food and the nurses are concerned and in awe. 

Rory Gilmore

Rory doesn’t tell Logan (because he is obviously the father in ADITL right??) until right after her 8 week ultrasound. He leaves Odette and comes back to be with her, and everyone pretends to be happy for them but they are extremely passive aggressive. She tries to ignore it and distracts herself by obsessively journaling, diving into pregnancy research, and getting really into hypnobirthing. She has to convince Logan that she needs a doula, but once he hears the statistics and realizes he isn’t being replaced he is on board. When she goes into spontaneous labor at 41 weeks, she is genuinely shocked that labor is hard. She has read about it extensively and prepared for a “pain free birth” and she's annoyed that her body isn't performing the way her research suggested. She says "I just didn't expect it to feel like this" at least six times, but perseveres and births the baby without an epidural. While she tries to validate all ways of birthing whenever it comes up, she obviously has a superiority complex about not getting an epidural. 

Luke Danes

Luke does not tell anyone but Lorelai that he is pregnant, and manages to hide it well until the rumors start circulating when he is around 20 weeks. People ask him about it but he is very firm about it being nobody's business, until it is brought up at a town meeting (WHICH LUKE DOES GO TO, ACTING LIKE HE DOESN’T IN THE LATER SEASONS IS A PLOT HOLE THAT ANNOYS ME) and he blows up and announces it. He does not want a baby shower. There is a baby shower. He stands in the corner for most of it, until he starts having contractions. He says they aren’t contractions (they very clearly are) so they go to the hospital. He doesn’t want an epidural but around 7 centimeters Lorelai asks if he is suffering. He says “I’m fine” in a very not fine voice, so she discretely asks the nurse to call anesthesia and by the time he asks for it anesthesia is walking in. After it starts working well, he says “I guess that’s alright” which is the closest he will ever come to admitting it was a good idea. He pushes the baby out in 10 minutes with no tearing, and is back at the diner in 48 hours (baby wearing). 

Emily Gilmore 

Emily has intense morning sickness and is absolutely miserable for most of her pregnancy. She is snippier than usual and Richard almost moves back to the pool house because of it, but Lorelai tells him he’s insane and it's his fault Emily is like this anyway. Despite the challenges, she throws an extravagant yet classy baby shower which is lovely. At 33 weeks, the baby becomes breech, and despite all the spinning babies maneuvers and trips to the chiropractor, the baby doesn’t flip. She schedules a c-section at 39 weeks and is happy because she gets to be well rested after birth. The baby is colicky but they have plenty of postpartum doula support, including overnights, so all is well. 

Paris Geller 

Paris also has terrible morning sickness but Nanny has remedies for it so she is not nearly as miserable as Emily was. She plans to have a home birth with a midwife, doula, and Nanny (Doyle is not allowed to be there) and she also gets into hypnobirthing. She is fiercely defensive of her midwife’s expertise and fights misinformation surrounding home birth and the prenatal care she receives. She forgoes a baby shower but has Rory come over for a two person sprinkle where they set up the nursery and house. Her birth plan is detailed and comes with a list of coping mechanisms she intends to work through gradually when the last one stops working. She goes into labor at 40 weeks and the list kind of goes out the window (the only thing she wants is counter pressure) but she has a beautiful water birth with minimal tearing. 

Dean Forester 

Dean tried to convince his partner for years to have a baby, but once he finally got pregnant he blamed them for all of his discomfort and became extremely resentful of them. He has a birth plan because someone else made it for him, all he cares about is getting an epidural and everyone surviving. He gets induced at 41 weeks + 6 days (his partner said no induction unless necessary) and he is angry the whole time. After 18 hours of cervical ripening he screams at his partner to get out and bring back food to actually be useful. His demeanor changes once they are gone and the nurses are confused until they see him on his phone texting someone he shouldn’t be, but they’ve seen it all so they are relatively unphased. He is talking on the phone with this person when his partner comes back, and he guiltily and quickly hangs up. His partner immediately knows because he has done this before because HE IS A CHEATING PIG!!! They start pitocin, he gets the epidural around 3 cm dilated, and has the baby 15 hours later. He has golden hour with the baby and is so happy, and his partner tries to enjoy it too. The phone is somewhere in the room. Nobody mentions the phone, but everybody is thinking about the phone (I purposefully didn’t make Lindsey his partner because she deserved so much better)

Jess Mariano 

Jess is somewhat happy when he finds out he is pregnant, but he is more happy that Rory is happy (this is where the inconsistent pairings come in, stay with me here!!). His feelings about becoming a parent are large and complicated and directly related to his own father not being around but he doesn’t talk about it, and this gets under Rory’s skin but she doesn’t push because he isn’t being cruel about needing space to sort through it like he was when he was younger. He reads every pregnancy book obviously and takes extensive notes about the experience to use in his writing later. He goes into spontaneous labor at 41 weeks and labors at home for as long as possible. He gets to the hospital at 9 cm dilated and the baby is born an hour later. 

Logan Huntzberger 

Logan is publicly very happy about the pregnancy but he is also secretly freaking out about becoming a parent because he doesn’t want to become his father. He is determined to be a good parent though and goes overboard on the shopping list and registry, much to Rory’s protests. When it comes to the birth he wants the epidural immediately and is confused on why people would choose to give birth unmedicated. He gets induced at 39 weeks at the nicest hospital and has an uncomplicated birth that he jokes/flirts through the entire time (all of the nurses are flustered) and the baby is perfect. He doesn’t let anyone come see him at the hospital, but his friends are waiting at their house to surprise them when they get home.